Reflections from Saranac

I was away for a week in Saranac Lake, New York. While I was there I decided to write some notes down, as a sort of journal. I will share those things I wrote, and learned.

Day 1 (Friday)
Didn't sleep. Ate and drank very little. Why? I wanted not to work on my own devices or strengths, but on God's strength through the Spirit. So far, so good. I am operating now on the Spirit, and not on Thomas. I've had fun connecting with the kids. We did an obstacle course, and I was covered in mud. But despite the dirt and grim, we worked together as a team. How wonderful. Cabin time tonight was GREAT. The Holy Spirit allowed me a chance to speak my testimony to the kids, and this is just night one. They seem to GET IT. Praise God.

Day 2 (Saturday)
Wow. How can I say more? God has blown my mind beyond all comprehension! Spending time with the teens is a great experience. They were asking the important life changing questions. "God, I pray that these questions break the hearts of the kids. Lord, tear them down. Let them know of their need for you. Please God, give us seed to soil upon this fertile soil. Give the water. give the sunshine. Provide the growth and multiply the increase. Lord shower your grace and mercy upon this camp. Drown us all in your love. Amen"

P.S. Blacklight party was great. Oh, and did I mention that someone caught my eye? Oh well, gotta keep focused on the mission.

Day 3 (Sunday)
Today has been the PERFECT day. I had to overcome some fears of mine. The two I had to face head on were the fears of failure and what others think of me. Today we did first did the ropes course. I won't lie- I was flipping scared. But I knew I had to be brave so the kids could overcome their fears. A leader always puts others first, despite his or her fears. We got all but 1 to go through the course. I say this is a success. One of our kids had an unfortunate experience or two, but at the end I spoke this to him "Do you know Espiritu Santo? He has gone before and will catch you before you fall". After that, he got up and jumped to the end of the course. Maybe it was what I said? Maybe he felt the Spirit speak to him? I know not. All I know is I came away feeling confident, both as an individual with fears and a leader. After this, we had half of our crew on the parasail boat. Again, WOW. Fear came over me. They go up like 200 feet! And it was cloudy, windy and sprinkling off and on. But, I did it. I embraced my fear and trusted in the Lord. And guess what? I enjoyed it. I wanted to go again! I see how everyone has that fear deep inside them, which will consume those who don't check it. Some choose to be ruled by fear, but I must allow Christ, who overcame the grave, to overcome my fears for me. I choose to live my life to the fullest, as God intends it. I will NOT be consumed by fear.

That is just part of the day. I am writing an addition to the day. Remember that girl that caught my eye? We danced. Okay, so she came over and asked if I would, and my roomie, Aaron told me to go for it....So I did. Evidently she is a good dancer, and I am such a terrible one. I was so nervous about dancing with a beautiful woman, but now...Well I feel more comfortable. Did I mention her eyes and smile are very nice? Heh. Anyways....

Today I have overcome so many fears, and God is working it to the best. He is providing me with a great time, and I see that life should be enjoyed. It is a praise to Him, so long as we don't let those things consume us.

Day 4
Remember how I talked about dancing last night? Well, I did a lot more dancing tonight at dinner time. And this time, I was the one asking girls to dance. Heh. My boys would say I have "swag". But something more impressive is happening outside of the sudden appearance of gusto in my life. These guys are opening up to one another and being completely vulnerable. They, like me, have looked fear in the face, and have chosen freedom over oppression. And their vulnerability causes me to be even more vulnerable to their needs. This both delights and frightens me. I am delighted to help the helpless to find hope in hopelessness. But I am very afraid of not being to help them. On my own, I WILL fail. But through Christ within me, their needs will be met and nurtured. God, bless me with the Spirit, that my life may be a testimony to your great works. Amen!

Days 5&6 didn't have entries, because i was busy talking to the guys about their need for Christ. I was also able to share my testimony with the camp with a cardboard testimony time. God really changed me through this experience. Since coming back, I have been acting out of faith in so many ways, and its just amazing me. Praise God!