Yet, I didn't apply it to my life. Not until after a dream I had last night. I will first tell the dream, then get into the lesson.
So I was in this building. I am assuming it was a Church, or a place where people gathered for Church. I was there and it felt familiar but uncomfortable. I was sitting in the back, when all of a sudden the Holy Spirit came over me. I fell to the ground, and people were around me asking what I was doing. I was in sort of a prostrated position, and was worshipping in a tongue. Then I was filled with inspiration to preach two passages from 1 Corinthians. One was 13:11, and the other was 11:23 to the end of the chapter.
So I got up, and was looking for a Bible to read from. There was already a man preaching, but I needed to find this Bible and speak from it! So I was going through all these books in this 'church'. Many of them were like self help sort of books. Finally I found a Bible! But when I went to the passages, they were not in there! I went through all the Bibles, but these passages were not in there! In fact, there were so many things not in there. All that was in the Bibles were nice passages of feel good things. I felt so mad! And so so upset! And I started speaking that which was on my heart, and people started leaving the Church angry.
Then I woke up. Now, when you read those verses, you'll read about putting away childish things and examining yourself before taking communion. These two verses are seemingly unrelated. In fact, I wondered all day why I had this dream. For a while, I felt a prophetic call! I was going to tell other Christians how bad they were, and they need to repent and turn to true faith.
Yet, in one of God's whacky, heavenly humor moments, I had this pie thrown back in my face. In fact, it was more like I was going to throw the pie, except I fell over my own feet and landed face first in the pie. Tasty, yet highly embarrassing. I was put in my place by a friend. She read the dream in an email, and the only thing she could say was "It sounds like you might need to repent".
Uh. What?!? ME? What did I do? I wanted to throw that opinion out the door. How stupid!
Yet those words have cut me to the heart all day. So much so, that the only thing on my mind from about 10 this morning until I got home was getting home to prostrate before God in humble submission, to confess my sins.
That is where my lesson comes in. See, I learned about a guy named Nehemiah. He was pretty legit, being the cup bearer to one of the most powerful men in the known world. Not only that, but he did lots of other things....Enough things to warrant a book in the Bible about what he did.
Here is how that book starts:
When I (Nehemiah) heard these things, I sat down and wept. For some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven. Then I said:
“LORD, the God of heaven, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with those who love him and keep his commandments, let your ear be attentive and your eyes open to hear the prayer your servant is praying before you day and night for your servants, the people of Israel. I confess the sins we Israelites, including myself and my father’s family, have committed against you. We have acted very wickedly toward you. We have not obeyed the commands, decrees and laws you gave your servant Moses.
Whoa! Not exactly the way I would start a story about myself. Where are the riches? The babes? The guns? The Star Wars references?
Yet, this is how Nehemiah begins! A man who is weeping. Not only weeping, but fasting, mourning and praying for days. Most people have problems fasting one meal or praying more than 5 or 10 mins! Yet Nehemiah was so distraught that he did these things for days.
And what does he do next? He affirms the greatness of God and then confesses sins. Not just his sin. But his father's family sins, and ALL of Israel's sins against God.
Now let me give you a bit of background here. What were these sins? Primarily idolatry. It is the sin that always gets Israel in trouble. God delivered them from Pharaoh, only for them to worship a golden calf! God gives them a new land to live and worship Him, only for the to worship the gods of the people they warred against. And here they were again, worshiping everyone and everything that wasn't YHWH.
Pretty rotten stuff, if you ask me. Enough to make pious man or woman upset, but why was Nehemiah so upset?
Pretty rotten stuff, if you ask me. Enough to make pious man or woman upset, but why was Nehemiah so upset?
God rose nations against Israel and everyone was put in captivity. The consequences of the sin were in full effect. The Holy City fell to pagans. The wall was knocked down, and more filth infiltrated into the Temple. Sin ran rampant. And the Israelites were paying for the sin of their nation.
So here is Nehemiah, begging God to forgive the sins of the people of Israel. What does God do? Well, evidently the pleas for mercy and grace fall on loving ears, because the rest of Nehemiah unfolds in a most excellent way. Nehemiah is given permission to return to Jerusalem. Once he gets there, he begins to rebuild the walls, despite much opposition. And something magnificent happens! All those who mocked him became frightened when they saw the work he was doing, because they knew YHWH was behind the work!
Now, after the wall was completed, Nehemiah began to read the law to the people. For hours they stood, listened, and worshiped the LORD. Then they confessed their sins before each other and before God.
From one man's repentant heart there came a wave of change to the people. Because one man saw his sin, and the sin of those around him, things changed. The people came back to the LORD.
This is a lesson for the leaders in all ministries to learn. If you want to see the people turn to the LORD, you must lead them there from YOUR KNEES. You cannot simply lead them from a pulpit or position of authority. You cannot lead them truth, by fancy words or convincing arguments. For if you were to work with an unrepentant heart, you would be look like the Jews in the eyes of their enemies. Their enemies saw a weak people, putting a bunch of stones on each other. The stones were so weak, that even a fox could make them crumble. YET, through the power of God, the city was restored, and the wall was made impressive.
If we try to bring the Gospel to people, without first confessing the sins of our lives, our churches, and our country, we will work in futility. In fact, I think we can see this happening already! Yet, if we confess our sins, and make our need known, God will do amazing things.
I know that I have had to confess a lot of things tonight. A lot of things that I didn't want to bring to light in my own mind, let alone to bring them to God. But, I know that if I am to be used by God to spread the message of His Gospel, then I need to confess my ways.I need to examine my heart. I need to move away from childish things. I need to do this and that. And by the grace of God, this impossible task, which may look foolish to the word, will be completed. And if He is willing, I pray that many will be drawn to Him by my efforts.
If you've read this, I hope that is your prayer as well.
But come, let us begin to lead the people back, by falling to our knees and cry out to God with our sins!
Be Blessed.
Thomas
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